|Parent Should Be An Eagle Eyes For Children - PROTECT AND STAND AGAINST EVERY FORM OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE by Starboy(m): Sat 16, October, 2021|
Some time ago, my husband and I were talking about our kids and what we hope their adulthood would be. Immediately,my Husband starts talking about my daughter’s first date and how prior to the time, he would teach her through his actions how a woman should be treated and loved using how he treats me as a typical example. However,he wouldn’t want a stranger taking his daughter on her first date ,He would want to do it .He would Open the car for her,pull out a seat for her in her favorite restaurant, blah blah blah.
Then when she is finally set to go out with her date, He will tell the guy that whatever he does to our daughter, he is getting the same measure. Kiss her on the lips and I am kissing you too. Raise your hands on her and I am shooting you,take her to your room….we all know the rest. It was amusing as I kept imagining the scenario and laughing my head off but then reality came crawling in.
WHAT HAPPENS WITH OUR SON ON HIS FIRST DATE?
I felt some form of disconnect at this point because I realised that it is an irony.
We protect the Girl child so much and we forget the Boy child is as vulnerable as the Female. We have coaching lessons for Boys /Men on how we want our daughters to be treated but do we tell Girls/Women how we want our son to be treated?
Don’t beat my daughter,don’t break her heart don’t make her cry… who tells their son’s girlfriend the same? Who says don’t break his heart ,don’t make him cry? We assume that underneath the Muscles of a man,lies sealed emotions and dried Tear ducts.
In our homes, we are careful with Males around our kids but it isn’t the same with Female.We are more relaxed with female nannies.
I have met a lot of men whose first sexual experience happened with a Neighbour,Nanny and even aunties.The only thing is that Men aren’t expected to spill that kind of information or their ego will be bruised and Masculinity cut by more than half. I bet the day we take a poll on the number of Men who were abused as kids,It will be an eye opener that in abuse no one is spared. The Girl child still leads in this poll as we are endangered even as adults.
As we protect our daughters today and have become Watch Dogs for them, LET’S NOT FORGET our sons. They are also endangered by the mere fact that they are kids ,easy preys and vulnerable. Sex education isn’t only for Girls.
I STAND AGAINST EVERY FORM OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE.
CHILD ABUSE SURVIVOR .
LET US ALSO PROTECT OUR SONS.
|RE: Parent Should Be an Eagle Eyes For Children - PROTECT AND STAND AGAINST EVERY FORM OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE by Abdullah(m): Sat 16, Oct 2021|
I say some women are the Bedrock and Enablers of Patriarchy. I honestly do not know whether it is Emotional Laziness,Physical Laziness or intellectual Laziness that causes it.
They are held bound by Religion and societal Norms ,They loose every value they should have.
I have had cases this year,centered around Child Sexual Abuse.
I have come to realise that Men actually Fight their children’s abusers more than women.
Let me give you 2 scenarios
Some time ago,I was added to a messenger group by a woman I respect so much on Facebook. A child was abused by their tenant and the mum ran to us for help.A group was formed to help the situation.
The Father of the girl seemed reluctant to involve the police and it was very suspicious for me especially.Albeit,there is nothing we could do without the consent of the Father to make a case.
My phone began to ring at about 3am. It was a call on messenger. I didn’t want to pick but the caller was persistent ,so I answered and I could hear serious screaming and anarchy going on in the background.
It so happened that the Father of the girl lured the tenant inside his house,over powered him,Tied him up and went to bring out an already sharpened Machete ,ready to castrate the Tenant. His wife’s plea of not taking the law into his hands was almost not working .
I requested that the phone be put on speaker and I began to say all the soothing words I know in this life to ease the pain,hurt,anger and betrayal he felt and Thankfully it worked. The tenant was handed over to the police and he currently resides in Ikoyi prison.
Another case happened sometime in March. A 4year old girl was abused by her Father. I was called in by a Pastor in my area and I started pursuing the case.
I was on my Way to my kid’s school for a brunch organised for mums when I got a call from the DPO to come immediately. I rushed to the station, only to be greeted by a woman saying ” release my husband” I no lock am again” Una wan kill my husband for me.
I sat down beside her and asked why she didn’t care about her daughter’s feelings and the trauma the girl is facing.
” I don talk my own finish. Na em pikin. If e say na she sweet pass me,that one consign am.No be em pikin”
I felt i could still make a case for the child ,since it is a crime of the state. It so appears that the mefical report given to her by the police for her daughter’s case,was torn. She shredded it .She tore the evidence of her husband’s wickedness and has put the life of her child in danger forever. WHY? THE MRS SYNDROME. The force that wants you to remain married even if your husband is the Devil himself.
Some women even beat these kids into silence.Keeping them locked up with their scars and nightmares,Blaming them for their own abuse as if the events in their life isn’t enough to last them a life time.
I am on one group on Facebook that gives the worst advise and this group is made up of women. Women advising other women to pray for Husbands who sleep with their underaged maids,children,relatives ETC. They tell them to send these children away with their trauma, leaving them damaged and with constant reminders of the ill that befell them.
Until we Beat stereotypes, Ignore societial norms and the stigma that we allow the society hang on us,We will keep burying our heads instead of standing Tall with the beautiful choices we make.
You are a witch and an enabler, If you tell a woman to Pray for a man who abused a child.
You are a witch and An Enabler if you think that the reason why a child was raped by a man old enough to be her father or young enough to be her brother is because of the wife’s inability to sexually satisfy her husband.
You are a witch and an enabler if you tell a woman that she should send the child away instead of soughting a solution on how to get that child both Therapeutic and Medical help.
If you are a woman and your husband rapes a child and you come on social media to ask what to do to save your marriage,YOU DESERVE TO BE STUNG BY A THOUSAND SCORPIONS.
If you are a woman and the “MRS ” title is more important than speaking on top of your voice and calling out crime,YOU DESERVE TO BE SWALLOWED BY A SNAKE.
I am an abuse surviour.
I stand against child abuse.
I speak for every child.
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